Three mostly youngish men with a dream to stop working 9 to 5, had a vision when they first started having to work 9 to 5. For a decade, they have kind of worked on, stopped, then started again, then stopped one more time for awhile, and now have started again on the show known as Delusional Word Salad. Here’s a bit about them.
Jake was born in 1985. He feels old, but retains his almost debilitating childlike wonder at things like; Legos, Superman, and his broken, not road legal 1986 volvo station wagon. His current whereabouts change from day to day.
Not much is known about Alex. According to the latest FBI profile, he did not exist until 1997. Going by Aliases such as “Fredrick Longdonger”, “Robert Hope” and “Smith Smithy”, he is wanted in connection to a number of fraud and blackmail schemes in relation to groups such as, The Girl Scouts Association of America, Toms Hardware Store, and Toys R Us.
Seth was spit out of the womb in the summer of 1989. Through careful application of beer and Metallica, he has somehow maintained his shoddy, sad existence. He is currently working hard on a new self help book entitled “Suicidal Depression: Hanging With the Wrong Crowd”, with a posthumous and speculative forward by Robin Williams.
Don Knotts was most popularly known as Barney Fife in the hit show, “The Andy Griffith Show”, as a bumbling, doofy character next to Andy Griffiths straight shooting protrayal. What most folks didn’t know was that Jesse Donald Knotts was a notorious ladykiller and womanizer, and as such, is immortalized here, and in our hearts forever more, as the master pussy slayer. May he lash Joan of Arc in heaven with his rapier like wit, and devilish tongue. Take that as you will.